Let Her Go…

 

I know Passenger originally sang this song but Jasmine Thompson’s voice is amazing!

 

You only know you love her when you let her go…

My Granddaddy always said- “You’ll never miss the water till the well runs dry!”.

Sometimes in life, love isn’t enough, compassion isn’t enough, caring isn’t enough, thoughtfulness isn’t enough, being there for someone isn’t enough, having a open loving heart isn’t enough BUT no matter what; in those “sometimes’ moments— YOU ARE STILL ENOUGH!!!! You are good enough, strong enough, YOU are loved, cherished, admired and wanted by someone! We all are!

There is always someone else going through your same struggles, pains and discouragement. You were made to heal, live, love and survive. Broken hearts heals, the bruises fade away the pain slowly turns to scars and you pick yourself back up, dust off and keep it moving!

Life isn’t easy. It wasn’t made to be easy. Without all the sweat and tears how else are we to become stronger? That backbone often spoken of, we all have it. Only you can determine how strong it really is. Only you can say when it’s broken, bent or torn. Only you have the power to use it to stand back up and say ENOUGH IS ENOUGH!

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Never be someones door mat. I don’t care who they are. You are special and were made with such a great and powerful love to have to even be treated less than you ever deserve. Do good and don’t change no matter how many times you get pushed to the side, walked on or treated poorly. At the end of everyday, lie your head down and know that you can smile because you gave the day and all the people in it your best! No one can take that from you! No one can take anything from you no matter how hard they try to belittle and destroy you.

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Some people “learn” you so well that they no exactly how to manipulate you. They know how far they can push your buttons and then when they need to “reel” you back in. They don’t want you but they don’t want to lose you. They benefit in some way from you but you won’t see that until you’re vision isn’t blurred by love. They will continue to do this until YOU decide that they are done toying with your heart, life and emotions.

We all know that it hurts like hell to breakup or let go of someone we truly love and care about. But you have to decide whom do you love more-Them or YOU? It is okay to sit around and cry about it but you gotta GET BACK UP and Move On! If they want to continue to do the things they know cause you pain- Let Them Go, they didn’t want a TOP SPOT in your life to begin with!

 

Seasonal people with lifetime expectations…..

~Tricia

Love is what you do…..

This morning….. This morning!

Well it’s been a bit since I’ve wrote on here and for some reason, I felt today I needed to get some things out. Maybe I’m holding to much in? Maybe I am tired of talking and it falling on deaf ears? Maybe I am just Burnt. Out!?

Deric…

Yep- He is STILL in the picture! After the break-up, I took him back for ANOTHER chance. With nothing but the same empty promises, never-ending perfect sounding words that have no actions to back them-up, the endless amounts of tears and anxiety!

Allow me to reiterate that again— Love. Is. Not. What. You. Say! Love. Is What. You. Do!!!

Let’s just start with today… I get a text this morning from Deric;

D- On my way to you

Be there in 10

Me- Are you coming in or am I supposed to come out?

D- In

D- I need to get my clothes you washed last night

Me- Ohhh… Okay (me disappointed because I was thinking he wanted to actually see me before the work day)

Deric comes in =, no Good Morning, No hug, No kiss, No how are you doing… But where are my clothes, you said you had them washed.

I say, they are clean Deric and folded. I put them in my room in the dresser that was yours. You are welcome to go in there and get what you need. Also, I made some breakfast for you, its finishing up now.

Deric was pissed because I didn’t have his clothes ready or something, I am still not sure what was wrong. But I finished up making his breakfast took the dog for a walk came back in and he was finishing up his food. I go and finish getting ready for work and come out of the bathroom and I am accused of cheating on him. Again, I have never cheated on him or any man for that matter!

I am like Deric, please don’t start. It’s early, I have to work all day and going in to work with a negative mindset, sucks! I said- what are you so upset about? I didn’t say or do anything wrong. He walks out and says “you gave the shirt I wanted to wear to some other man!” Please keep in mind- I have bought all of this mans clothes for one and for 2 how the heck am I supposed to know what shirt he even wanted?!!? And 3— WHAT MAN???

Anyways, at this point I’m upset, feel the tears bellowing up in my eyes and I just stop and look at him and breath. There isn’t anything more I can say to this man. I have said all the right things at this point and I needed to be positive about my day and myself.

I gather my belongings as I can hear the jeep starting rush out the door and wait for him to say goodbye to me and kiss me and say I love you… instead he says’ can you move so I can back out please, I need to get to work. I mean OUCH!!!! Like not 1 thank you throughout the 20 mins he was there, no apology for coming in so hateful and grouchy, no good morning, no hug, no kiss, no I love you, no you look great today, no nothing! As I stood there and watched him drive a way, it took all that I could not to feel defeated and devastated and humiliated.

You see- love is more than words, words are nothing. The ways that Deric talks to me, treats me and is to me are not in a loving way. Deric talks a great talk WHEN he will benefit from the situation. But he can never walk the walk of the talk he talked!

When is enough enough? When do I swallow my pride and sit back and realize I can change this situation on my own and that I have been the woman that I am supposed to be in every aspect and still I am Deric’s doormat?

I know I am wearing thin of patience, trust, communication and the worst–love… I feel like I have love for him still but I am not feeling like I actually am still in-love with him. How can I be?

Love is what you DO….

~Tricia